Wednesday, January 11, 2012

If my parents had ever found out....

... sad part is, they already knew...

I feel for the poor guy in the picture above. HAD to be a rough night.

Fortunately, I can't say I remember any of these particular positions.  I suppose that could either be good or bad, depending on how you look at it.

And in the interest of maintaining a good reputation, I'm only admitting to the things my parents already know about. We've had discussions of mine and my brother's childhood and the things we did that we assumed our parents never knew about once we reached adulthood and knew we could no longer get punished for these things.

My poor brother experienced a large amount of torture as a child growing up with a bigger sister like myself. Some of the torture was given in the presence of my parents. I had to give him some sort of consequence. Hell, he was ALWAYS looking out my damn window!!

I TOLD my parents I wanted a sister; they didn't listen; I frequently made my brother wear what I called a wig - which was basically a hand towel attached to the hair on the back of his head using whatever little clips I could find laying around the house that would hold it up.

I was a curious little child. At one point, I wanted to learn how to cook, but my mother said I was too irritating to be in the kitchen to help her when she cooked. Therefore, I would wake my brother up bright and early in the morning on the weekends, drag him into the kitchen, and put random food and non-food items together in bowls and glasses and force him to taste it and tell me if it was good. I feel my mother was thankful for him to be alive over the years and possibly even regretted ever telling me to get out of the kitchen when she was cooking REAL food.

During my younger years, I went through a "wanna be a hairdresser" phase. And we spent a lot of time at my grandmother's house. She would frequently trust us to be alone together in a room where she was not present. The room had scissors. End of story. I think I might've gotten in some sort of trouble for this at some point.

As we got older, we thought it was amusing for my brother to wear my bras on top of his shirts.... thanks to my father and his love of videotaping EVERYTHING, my brother has yet to live this down.

(P.S. The pictures above are NOT of my brother and names have been avoided to protect the not-so-innocent victim of each scenario.)

Of course, there's many things I've done over the years that my parents eventually found out about that DID NOT include my brother. Looking back, THANKFULLY, I'm still alive.

This has been a Blog Dare post for Jan 11, 2012.

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