You’re single?
I don’t understand why a pretty girl like you is single?
No, you can’t be single.
You at least DATE, right?
You don’t date? Why not?
I have nothing. Absolutely nothing. No response other than complete dissatisfaction for constantly being reminded that I’m an un-wanted outcast.
Surely, I’m not the only single female who hears comments like this. The funny thing is, the majority of people who throw these comments around are men who apparently have no balls to confront a woman in person, OFF the Internet.
The only response I can even imagine would be to tell these fools that I guess I’m still single, because I refuse to date someone who might possibly be a child molester, who lacks his male genitalia, from cyberspace.
Following a few MySpace messages such as the ones above, which lowered my self-esteem a notch or two, I proceeded to conduct my own small research project. I questioned a few guys I know personally to see what their theories are on why I’m still single – why males seem to refuse to approach me in person. Possibly, I’m only attractive to men on MySpace. *insert eye roll here*
Here were the responses I received -
1. Guys are intimidated by you.
-So, all guys are pussies deep down? What… are you “men” afraid that I’m going to set your house on fire and strap explosives to your forehead? Intimidated – a more sophisticated way of saying “I’m a big damn pussy, and I’m scared to death of you.”
2. They know you don’t trust people.
-All men know I don’t trust people? All men know that I’m the only person on the planet who don’t trust people? You can’t tell me that everyone of the male species is smart enough to sense that I don’t trust people without having ever met me or even talked to me for that matter.
3. You scare men, because you know your shit.
-I’m smart – or at least know how to debate to a certain extent whether it’s the truth I’m debating or not – and that scares men off? Come on now… again, I don’t talk to all men, so you’re telling me that’s just something men automatically sense when looking at a person? I think not. Also, refer to the response to #1 regarding the “you scare men” part of that phrase.
4. You wanna be single.
-Says who? Again, how do ALL men know this? Sure, I’d RATHER be single as opposed to settling for one of the many douchebags running around out there – not saying all men are douchebags, but I would guesstimate that around half of the ones I’ve met are very close to fitting that description.
5. You write blogs about being single.
-Uh, that’s all I know as of recently – being single and dating douchebags. Besides, not all men know how to read and the ones who do, don’t always like to read – especially not when the reading involves some single girl’s MySpace blogs.
6. If you didn’t wanna be single, you would OPEN YOUR EYES.
-This person might potentially be willing to change my relationship status. Unfortunately, this person isn’t aware that I know things about them that makes me hesitant on him changing my relationship status. No thank you. P.S. If my eyes weren’t always open, I’d be covered in bruises. I’m not. They’re open.
7. Some guys have a basic knowledge of females and don’t have patience to deal with their walls or barriers.
-No, sir, some guys are just pussies.
8. Because you’re crazy.
-And you’re wimpy, but we weren’t name calling, we were explaining why I’m single. And I never denied the fact that I’m crazy. You apparently just prefer females who are in denial or you enjoy being single more than anyone else I know, because sir, we’re all crazy. That’s not a unique trait, trust me.
9. Because you’re too picky.
-Could it be that you’re just mad because you’re part of the crowd I refuse to date since you either A. don’t believe in God, B. use or sell drugs, or C. don’t like kids. Look at my track record – you can see I’m obviously not too picky, but this day in time I can’t afford to not be at least a little picky about who I choose.
10. Maybe most guys think you’re too wonderful so they thought you had a man.
-Had – past tense of ‘have.’ Past – something that happened before this point in time. And, thank you, my friend, for the ego boost. :)
Moral of the story – okay well there’s not one, so I’m going to end on a somewhat bitter note since I’ve read through all these reasons from a male’s perspective on why I’m single. So, the BITTER moral of the story is – ladies, most men obviously walk around with their balls crammed up their ….
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